Funny: Obama and Free Lunches for Zombies

Subject: Funny: Obama and Free Lunches for Zombies Thu Apr 02, 2009 8:25 pm

It is a story that could make the Return of the Living Dead 6. A group of good people huddle on a roof, with a limited supply of raw meat. A crowd of zombies surrounds the house: hungry, mad, aggressive. Fear spreads and bodies collapse; the odour is terrible. The zombies smell blood and flesh on the roof; they scream and start climbing the walls.

The moment you stop feeding zombies they will come after you and we all turn into the living dead. So you keep feeding them in the hope that by the time the next night comes around, a new helicopter will arrive that - just in time - can drop new batches of zombie-food. It's the only way to survive. Attacking these creatures is very dangerous: when one zombie was destroyed a few months ago, the rest got so angry that they ate alive the entire nearby town.

This zombie danse macabre can be observed in real life. The people sitting on the roof are United States taxpayers; the zombies gathered around are bankers screaming for more and more support; the taxpayers' money is turning into zombie-food. The roof-commanders say: "We've got to feed them or they will come after us, shutting down credit to zero, selling all world assets, depressing prices to rock-bottom - and we all turn into financial zombies. There is no other option than to feed the zombies."

And the new supplies keep coming. Ben is a very skilful helicopter pilot; his master manoeuvres always drop new zombie-food suppies in the right place, at about the right time. Ben has recently taken on a new crew-member, Barack, who came with a fresh idea to keep zombie-bankers away from the house: "Let's feed them much more: maybe if they have lots of food, one by one they will transform back into humans".

But as time passed, zombie-bankers were joined by zombie car-manufactures, and with the death-virus spreading more zombies are on their way. Barack is undaunted. With Ben nodding beside him, he yells down to the beleaguered rooftop group: "No matter how many come, we will feed them to save you."

http://www.opendemocracy.net/article/the-zombie-solution

Funny: Obama and Free Lunches for Zombies

Funny: Obama and Free Lunches for Zombies

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